Choosing to be a Caregiver: The Transition Into The Role A Caregiver

In this series, Choosing to be a Caregiver, we have discussed what it really means to be a Caregiver, ways of coping with the diagnosis of Dementia or Alzheimer’s as a Caregiver, important questions to assist you in determining if caregiving is right for you, and shared with you various duties a Caregiver may be responsible for while caring for their loved one.

You may have been caring for your loved one for some time now, helping with housekeeping, bringing meals over during the week, or keeping track of their finances, but you have not identified yourself as their Caregiver. You notice that your loved one is becoming more dependent on you. This brings you to determining that it may be time to step into the role of being your loved one’s primary Caregiver. As you transition into the role of being your loved one’s primary Caregiver, keep in mind the following points that will be beneficially during this transition.

First, it is important to accept and make peace with your new reality. Transitioning into this role may be an easy one. Although your loved one is dependent on you, they may have not completely lost their ability of doing things for themselves such as getting ready for the day, preparing meals, or grooming themselves. In this case, the transition may be a slow process allowing you to adjust your life accordingly at a comfortable pace. On the other hand, the transition may be more challenging due to a sudden diagnosis or injury your loved one may have sustained. In this case, your loved one will be relying on you for everything immediately. Accepting the circumstances for what they are and making peace with them will allow you provide the best care to your loved one.

Secondly, it is important to understand the common emotional experiences a Caregiver goes through during this time of transition. These feelings are normal and important to recognize in order to properly care for yourself and your loved one. Some of these emotional experiences include:

• Sadness and grief over the loss of a parent you once knew who was independent and now has lost that independence.
• Fear/Guilt for not being able to provide your loved one the care they need; making the wrong decision; disappointing/angering them; or feeling like you are not doing enough,
• Resentment because of the demands of caregiving which can be a sign that you may be doing too much and that it may be to look for resources within and outside of your family.
• Anxiety and worry about the physical and emotional safety of your loved one.
• Love and acceptance may increase when there is a change in perspective of your loved one and recognize them as adults who are facing their own challenges and transitions.

It is also important to keep the lines of communication open with everyone involved in caregiving which include family and outside Caregivers. This is to ensure the best decisions are being made. Speaking honestly and openly with your family and outside help can help you get through those tough times. Your family and/or outside Caregivers can act as support as you go through making hard decisions or having difficult conversations with your loved one.

Managing your transition into the primary Caregiver role can keep you from suffering Caregiver burnout and help you to provide the care your loved one needs and deserves. Remember your well-being matters too. Here are some tips to help you manage your transition into being the best primary Caregiver for your loved one:

Support groups can be a great resource for you to maintain control over your lives, to share and listen to experiences similar to what you’re going through and get insight on how to deal with different situations that may come up as you become more invested as a primary Caregiver.

Encourage your parent’s independence can help them stay positive and feel like they are still in control of their lives. Give them the opportunity to be involved in making as many decisions as possible that doesn’t jeopardize their health or safety.

Doing your homework can help you find resources that are available for seniors and their Caregivers that offer help at home to assisted living that can encourage your loved one to be more independent. Knowing your options can help you make the best decision for your loved one.

Call a professional for assistance when you begin to feel overwhelmed. This can be your loved one’s physician, a social worker, or care manager who can guide you through the options that are available to you.

As you transition into becoming your loved one’s Caregiver, keep in mid that it is important to accept and make peace with your new reality as a Caregiver, understand the emotional experiences you may go through, how important it is to keep communication open with family and outside help, and ways to manage your transition as you become more invested.

In next weeks blog, we will be wrapping this series up with the essential steps to getting started as a Caregiver and ways to prepare for caregiving. Please feel free to subscribe, share, and comment below. We would love to hear from you.